A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home
~~~
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."
~~~
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the....
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
~~~
Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other "Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?"
The other one says "No, It doesn't worry me, I'm a horse!"
~~~
A: Just look at that young person with the short hair and blue jeans. Is it a boy or a girl?
B: It's a girl. She's my daughter.
A: Oh, I'm sorry, sir. I didn't know that you were her father.
B: I'm not. I'm her mother.
~~~
A snail walks into a bar and the barman tells him there's a strict policy about having snails in the bar and so kicks him out.
A year later the same snail re-enters the bar and asks the barman "What did you do that for?"
~~~
Man: I could go to the end of the world for you.
Woman: Yes, but would you stay there?
Man: I offer you myself.
Woman: I am sorry I never accept cheap gifts.
Man: I want to share everything with you.
Woman: Let's start from your bank account.
~~~
A: Hey, man! Please call me a taxi.
B: Yes, sir. You are a taxi.
~~~
My friend said he knew a man with a wooden leg named Smith.
So I asked him "What was the name of his other leg?"
~~~
Bank Teller: How do you like the money?
English Student: I like it very much.
~~
PUPIL: "Would you punish me for something I didn’t do?"
TEACHER:" Of course not."
PUPIL: "Good, because I haven’t done my homework."
~~~
A teenage girl had been talking on the phone for about half an hour, and then she hung up.
"Wow!," said her father, "That was short. You usually talk for two hours. What happened?"
"Wrong number," replied the girl.
~~
I wanted to send u something nice that would make u smile but the postman told me to get out of the mailbox!

Hey folks! How'd you like my new pic? Any comments? Don't be shy, c'mon, i can take it.....

tell you what.....have you noticed the signs? the earthquake in china, the tornadoes in midwest US, the flooding in India, the flooding in Central US and some parts of Europe, the Japanese stabber who killed 7, the earthquake in Japan, the global food and fuel crisis, another flooding in the US particularly of the Mississipi River and just yesterday, the severed feet, a total of 6 found ashore somewhere in British Columbia in Canada.....i don't know but it somehow reminds me of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse....interesting thought don't you think?

dorood akisha jan , omidvaram halet khob bashe , kheyli kam peyda shodi , malome ke hesabi saret shologhe , man ke delam barat tang shode , mikham pisha pish tavalodeto tabrik begam va roye maheto az dor mibosam ke age inja bodi hesabi baghalet mikardam va mibosidamet albate ba kadohaaaaaaaa , omidvaram salhaye sal por az eshgh bashi va shademan dar kenare khanevadeye golet rozegaro separi koni . baz ham tabrik . happy birthday to you . boooooooooooooooooooos jigar .

Hi
Which books are Your favorite?

Hi Helen

Thanks for your message.
Please write about your part of the world when you are free
Have a nice day

Hi Helen,
Thanks a lot for adding me. How r u doing?

Hi Helen, Hope to chat with you soon. Thanks for adding me to your list of friends here. :)

Take care and God bless!

hi...lovely helen....
hw r u.....
thks 4 add me 2 ur list....
wish u very happy girl....

hi helen, how r u ? nice to meet u . have a good day ! :)